Care Packages

This week I have felt so blessed with gifts, particularly care packages. A teacher from my high school went up to my mom and told her that she had sent me a package. So I went to check and see if the package was there, and when I received the package I realized that it was in fact from my aunt and uncle. They packed up a box of food, candy, coffee, etc. for me to have over finals week. I thought that it was so sweet that they would think of me enough to send me an entire box of food. I am now also looking forward to the package my high school teacher as sending me. I also appreciated the food and survival bags professors were giving out in class. I have truly felt blessed in receiving this many packages. People on my floor have been jealous of me lately, that I have gotten so many while they haven't. It makes me thankful that God has blessed me with so many awesome friends and family in my life, and it makes me realize that I have so much to be thankful for in this Christmas season. Now I just can't wait for break!

Poems

Doing my credo made me realize how much I do enjoy writing poems. When I was younger, I always disliked them, but the older I get, the more meaning I am able to draw out of them. I think that writing poems are fun because while they involve some deep thought, they also involve simpler things, such as rhyming (which has always been a favorite of mine). It is funny to think that sometimes I will look for a certain song lyrics, or quote, or poem to use as a facebook status, etc. when in reality I could just make up my own saying. Sometimes, I don't think that people give themselves enough credit. Quotes, while they are always good to reinforce points, are really just words said by someone else. I think I am going to start making up my own quotes and/or poems as a way of expression. Sometimes, when I am writing, I wonder why I ever wanted to do biology in the first place. Art and writing sometimes come much easier, but then again I love biology and science just as much. I wish that I could write my own poem on what I am supposed to do with my life.

Birthdays

This weekend has surprisingly been really fun. At first I was rather disappointed that Brett thought it would be better if I didn't come home, because he had wrestling and thought that he would be busy most of the time, therefore it wouldn't be beneficial for me to come home. However, I am now seeing that I was supposed to stay here for a reason. One, I am extremely glad that I didn't leave because of all this bad weather we have gotten today! I was so surprised to wake up and see all the snow had melted to water, however, things changed quickly enough as everything started to freeze back up into ice and the blizzard was on it's way. Second, I am glad I stayed because my floor (well, most of my floor) went out for two of my friends, Alea and Jordan's, birthdays. While we were going to go to Cedar Falls to Buffalo Wild Wings, we ended up just going to Joe's for wings. I didn't think they were that great, but it was nice to be with my friends and meet some new people. And third, I am glad I stayed because tonight I ended up hanging out with some girls down the hall, and while I may regret my decision tomorrow when I have so much studying to do, it was a super fun night and I feel like I have made some new friends. I think that I was supposed to stay here to realize that I should be having a good time and meeting people in college, and that going home so often may not always be the best decision for me.

Distracted

I am behind on my blogging lately, and I have to say that I blame Brett. Since we have been kind of rocky lately, I have been putting so much time into thinking about him that it seems everything else is getting placed on the back burner. I know that it should be the other way around, but sometimes it is hard not to get caught up in relationship drama. I wish that we were still fine, but I think that he is starting to see this may be harder than he expected it to. While I understand his wishes, it is still hard to think that I may have to let go of what we have. Obviously I know that God has a better plan for me, even if it doesn't involve Brett like I may wish. I wish that sometimes my "path" in life was easier to see. Lately I feel like nothing that I thought was certain is. I feel like I am confused with Brett, my future career, and even if I want to stay at Wartburg next year. While I really love the school, I am starting to wonder that maybe even with my scholarships this school is just going to cost my family to much financially. It is hard to say what is right at this point, but I hope that God will make my path clearer to me as time goes on.